The Days of Bread and Milk and Baby

One of the difficulties of having a second child is that I have been trying to treat her like she was my first.  And she’s not.  The good part is that she sleeps from 9 pm to 6:30 am with only a couple of nursings in the night, and goes right back to sleep–if she is on me.  I don’t mind that so much right now, but I will have to figure out at some point how to get her to sleep in her pack n’ play at some point.  Heck, at some point I suppose we should put the crib back together, huh?

But during the day, I am lucky if I get her to take an hour nap.  And I think it comes down to this–she is a wakeful baby.  I have books for every occasion, so I broke out the parenting books, looking up “sleep,” “fussiness,” etc.  But now I think it is mostly boredom.  She sleeps only about 12 out of the 24 hours–not typical for a young baby.  She has all this awake time in the day and she can’t crawl, or play with toys yet, so she is bored.  I have to shift my thinking from planning what I can accomplish during her naps and realize this is it–anything I want to get done will have to get done while she’s awake.  Unless I don’t want to sleep at night, and that is a non-negotiable for me.  I am very, very crabby when sleepy.

Somewhere in all this, I also need to figure when to pump.  And she nurses like crazy during the day.  Or maybe that’s just me, with my one-boob-fits-all approach to baby problems.  Worked great with Rowan.  Nova also talks (or in her case, burbles) in her sleep and has little bad baby dreams too.  Leif and I joke about that–what bad things has she experienced so far?  Loss of the boob perhaps?

Meanwhile, I realized I gave away a bunch of my pregnancy pants, because I have been living in my yoga pants.  I love yoga pants, but I don’t think I can really wear them to work.  Oops, guess working out has just been put on high priority now.  I’ve got six weeks to fit back into my old pants.  At least I can do cardio with her in the baby bjorn.

Author: ~R

I write about life, people, and the things that interest in me. Which often includes death, sex, friendship, and the future of humanity. I hope for the best in people and I prepare for the worst. But no matter what happens, change is constant and everything will be ok.

6 thoughts on “The Days of Bread and Milk and Baby”

  1. Have you tried putting her in a car seat and putting the car seat on top of a running clothes dryer to get her to sleep?

    Both Sergey and Xavier weren’t champion sleepers during the day, so I feel your pain. Perhaps putting her under one of those baby entertainment mats in the kitchen while you are cooking (totally blanking out on the name, but they have arches over with hanging animals and blinking lights, you know what I am talking about, right?) – if she can hear your voice, perhaps she won’t be as upset?

    Wish I had sage advice for you…

  2. I feel your pain. Until Beth was about 8 months old, she was a 10 minute napper. That drove me absolutely insane because when she was awake I couldn’t get anything done. And then about the time you decide what you’re going to do while she naps, she’s awake again. And that only happened about 3 times a day anyway. Bed at 10p, up at 5a, essentially no naps. She eventually grew out of it, but to this day, she unfortunately usually needs quiet to sleep. But now we usually can get an hour out of her in the morning and two hours in the afternoon. And she goes to bed around 8pm when Alex does and usually sleeps until 6 or 6:30a. Alex was such a content baby that even though he didn’t nap at all, he was no trouble at all.

    Olya’s trick worked for someone else recently. I didn’t try it myself because it was too darn cold in our basement to spend any time down there with the dryer.

    It will get better! My Beth is proof of that.

  3. Out of curiosity, how do you mean “treating her like she was my first.” In what way? Or in what thoughts?

    And also, what do you mean by one boob fits all approach? Do you only nurse from one side and pump the other? Or does one side produce more and the other not at all?

    I ask because I am in the midst of worry about being too lopsided because one side is a fast flow and the other is a medium to slow — which she doesn’t like. Kind of funny considering when she was smaller she preferred the slow side more.

  4. @hadjare, with Rowan (as I recall) everything was pretty easy. For example, Rowan loved the swing. Nova hates it, I’m lucky if she’ll last 5 minutes. For Nova, we actually bought one of those vibrating chairs (sometimes it works), which we never needed with Rowan. And I know Rowan slept more.

    When nursing, Rowan would latch on and stay there until done, usually one breast per feeding. I actually used to pump the other side simultaneously while giving Rowan her first morning feeding. But Nova will suck for a few minutes, then needed to burped or bounced (or both), then will nurse again. This often needs to be repeated 3-5 times and often, 30 minutes later she will need to nurse again.

    Also, Rowan took to the bottle right away and was pretty interchangeable with breast and bottle. Guess who doesn’t like bottle? We’ll get there, (have to for daycare), but it’s just another issue we have to work through. Generally, with Rowan, when she fussed she wanted to be nursed, either for food or comfort. Nova is a bit more complicated, hence the “one-boob-fits-all” approach does not work. Although that is a misnomer, because she does actually feed from both, even if I keep losing track of which side she’s on. 🙂

  5. The bottle will come when it’s needed. Alex did not take a bottle from anyone (even if I disappeared) until the first day of daycare. I was terrified when I picked him up 5 hours later that he would be screaming because he hadn’t eaten all morning. Turns out, he gave Barb absolutely no problem with the bottle, and never did. Beth, on the other had, took to it with no problem. I started supplementing at 2 weeks because she wasn’t gaining weight. Now she’s my little chubster at 25 lbs at 1 year old.

    It is amazing how different the two kids are. Possibly in part because they’re different genders, but I talk to my mother and she points out how different me and my sisters were. Drives me crazy because things that worked with Alex just don’t work with Beth. You learn to try it anyway and then find some thing else if you need to.

  6. Ahhh thank you for the clarification! 🙂 I see what you mean now. One boob fits all — it’s the remedy I use for Athena, though I often tried the bottle of EBM with Morella. I lucked out on an “easier” second baby. Though is it easier if she only wants me to hold her and will tolerate only two other people? I don’t know. Morella was pretty social.

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